I always get pissed when my mum and grandma don't understand the commitments I have.
I'm pretty sure some teenagers would be pleased to have my mum and grandma as their family members because they would always ask me to pon my cca and school and whatsoever.
They don't understand that my final Track Nationals is coming in 2 weeks and I am only left with 6 trainings to LEARN triple jump.
They tell me that track competition is not important at all and I should just pon training tmr just to have lunch with them.
I mean like, sure, personally, track competition isn't really a very big deal for me.
I'm not a pro athlete like my fellow track mates who have actually been close to winning something or actually winning something, the greatest accolade I have in my 5 years of track life so far is "Top 20 in Long Jump" in which I came in 17th.
So I'm just going for this track competition to get the chance to represent my school, get participation points and just beat my own personal record.
i don't even feel like typing anymore because my mum and grandma are really pissing me off.
i need to do more cip.

On a long train ride earlier in the day, I read the news about this AC J3 senior who passed away 3 days before the release of A levels results.
I was deeply saddened by this news. Even though I didn't know this senior personally, I've never even heard of his name before, but the fact that he was an ACSian struck a chord within me.
And one spooky thing that happened is that, one day after he passed away (when this news wasn't made known yet), i was telling my friend about how i had this random thought on a long bus ride about my funeral.
My daydream went sth like this: i was doing some form of environmental act and I got banged down by a car.
Then the next day, my vice principal would say an awesome speech about me in school, commending me for all I have done in my life and making me sound 10times cooler than I thought myself to ever be.
And the whole school would cry for me, those who were my friends or acquaintances would cry and miss me.
But ah well, that was just this random daydream.
Anyway back to the point, it feels so spooky that I would have such a thought and a few days this would really come true for someone else in my school.
Or at least I think the principal/viceprincipal would talk about him..
Idk what to talk about already, terms is in less than 2 days and i'm utterly screwed =/

Watched the Class of 2011 Seniors get back their A levels results today.
I think the point of the school releasing us J2s to go watch is to give us a prelude of what we will be experiencing at this same time next year.
And yea, I guessed it kinda worked.
Watching them receive their results, I wondered to myself, will I be one of those going up on stage next year to receive my results? Or will I be like one of those sitting in their seats anxiously hoping for their name to be called but to be disappointed in the end?
I'm too scared to study now, A levels seems so scary and daunting that I don't know how I am going to survive this year.
6 distinctions is the max I can get and that sounds so simple yet so hard..
I don't know what i'm blabbering about now, I'm supposed to be studying for terms.
If I can't even score well for terms then I don't even need to talk about A Leels already.
I can't afford to get into SSP for terms!!!!!!
Kbye!

I was filling up my AC portfolio thingy online when I had to write a reflection for CIPs that I had done so far.
Filled in Chingay as one of my CIPs and began typing out my reflections and decided to post it here too :)

Starting off 2012 with a Big Bang!

Joining Chingay 2012 is definitely one of the best decisions I have ever made in my life. It is more than just a performance for the public; the deep friendships bonds forged and the various struggles that all of us overcame through the Chingay process were just unforgettable. Some of the challenges I faced included travelling long distances to attend trainings and meetings, juggling between school work and other commitments, and rushing for the last trains at the Chingay Preview and Final Show. I have learnt a lot from my Chingay experience that I can apply to my school life. Chingay trainings are like tutorials and lectures, Chingay rehearsals are like term exams, Chingay Preview is like the Prelims and of course, the Chingay Final Show itself is like the A Levels. Trainings are used to teach us the dance moves, help us to familiarise them, interact with our fellow group mates and learn from one another. The rehearsals is used to give us a feel of how the real thing will probably feel like and give us a chance to familiarise with the performance surroundings and understand which parts (e.g. positionings) could have been done better. The Preview includes audiences, making it feel even more like the real deal and it allows us to finalise the little details so that the Final Show can be a great success. The Final Show is the defining moment for us, it is the moment that we have been struggling towards for so long. It is the time when all our efforts will pay off and at the moment when the sound of the last music ends, when we hear the audience cheering for us, it is the time where we will feel that sense of satisfaction knowing that all our hard work had paid off. Similarly, right now, I might feel that tutorials and lectures are hard work, but at the end, if I had really put in my best for the A Levels, I know that the A Levels results that I will get next year will not disappoint me. It will all be worth it in the end because we're all in this together. :)

I'm on a long bus ride now, so as I promised, i'll blog~
I can't believe I'm J2 already, it feels like just yesterday when i was playing orientation games with my OG.
I miss my OG, well, most of them anyway. They were one of my best groups of friends that I made in AC. Other awesome groups would be my china trip friends. Environment council peeps and outside of AC, Soka Chingay dearies~
AC never felt I was important enough to go for CCAAB or enthusiastic enough to be an OGL but I have taken it all in my stride already.
Yea these two facts hurt me for a while but at the end, I have gotten better things in return.
I'm being utterly random here.
Anyway, let's talk about Chingay first.
Chingay 2012 has been an awesome experience where I met an amazing group of new friends. Every bit of memory with them is oh-so-precious and sweet :)
Although I didn't encounter any big problems in the process of Chingay, I have still grown more mature and learnt many great lessons from those around me whom, despite their various obstacles, never gave up on life. All their strong spirits really touched me~
Let's hope that I can join Chingay 2013 and be in the same group as them again :)
Other than Chingay, I have been trying to get myself involved in more CIP stuff so that I can contribute more to the society.
It doesn't bother me anymore if I'm not Miss Popular in school because I know there are many people in Singapore who don't even have thos prestigious chance to study in AC.
I will just make the most of my time in AC, contribute in whatever ways I can to make the world a better place.
I'm going for this Tzu-Chi recycling volunteer thing tmr morning which is environment related, one of the areas I am passionate in.
As much as I hope to do more CIP, I have dawned upon the fact that A levels is still my main priority this year as a student.
I am currently considering whether I should volunteer at this centre where I tutor less privileged children weekly. I would have to balance this with my own studies well since this would take up about 3 hours a week?
All in all, self discipline on my part is still of utmost importance.
Right now, I am still slacking away like nobody's business and I feel so bad when i see my two close classmates working so hard and I'm just spreading my slackness aura to them =/
I NEED TO MANAGE MY TIME PROPERLY.
I read so many motivational books on how to be a good student and how to manage time properly, i can even summarise what they are talking about but I just can't seem to carry out their advice :(
I rant about the same things all the time, omg, i hate myself now blehhhh.
Anyway I'm reaching home soon so byeeeeeeeeee :)

I wanna post long stories about my life but I'm too lazy =/
But to summarise,
CHINGAY 2012 IS AWESOME!!!!
Maybe I'll post more about it on my next long bus ride.
Anyway, recently I have been addicted to pi again!
3.14159265358979323846264338327950288419
7169399358107520974944592307816406286208
9986280348253421170679821480865132823066

Typed this all from memory :))))))
Haha I'm damn lame, instead of memorising all the Chemistry reactions and reagents, I'm memorising useless numbers =X
Good night awesome world! :)

The front is DAMN AWESOME!!!! :D :D